All posts tagged monkey

Red Leather Wedge Shoes

Published May 30, 2012 by Sandee

My train ride wasn’t so hellish today.  There was a mummy with her baby on there.  It was screeching.  It looked like a monkey – oh it was so, cute!  I looked at it and smiled.  Its mummy fed it crackers.  I was calm and giving out good vibrations because of it.  I don’t enjoy the trains they usually have on the A line because the doors at either end are locked.  They make me feel like I’m in a coffin.  The train I was on today was an old one.  These trains have doors that open on either end so you can walk through them to the next car, or take a piss between them.  Years ago on my way back from The Bottom Line with my boyfriend and another couple, I had to pee.  We were drunk.  On one of these trains, we all went between the cars, so that they could guard me so I could pee unseen.  It was winter and freezing cold between the cars.  They sang while I pissed, “Don’t freeze your booty hole!”  Good times…good times…

So it was nice, having to do this difficult errand and being given a big old silver train to ride.  I listened to the baby screeching and looked at different passengers.  The man across from me had a horrible patch of psoriasis on his arm, but I said, hey, I have a rash on my arm too, from food allergies, I’m guessing.  I must take care of it soon. There was a nice-looking woman wearing a short skirt and some old scraped up red leather wedge shoes.  The shoes were cool looking, high.  The wedge part was red leather as well and the toe part was like a pump shoe.  The rest of the woman’s clothes weren’t beaten up, only the shoes were.  She allowed me to look at her – she didn’t look back defensively, or give off a ‘why is this bitch looking at me vibration.’  So I looked at the monkey baby, the man with the rash and the lady with the red shoes between thinking about my mission.  When the train pulled into 59th Street, the man sitting next to the woman in the red shoes told her that he liked her shoes too!  It was good to see that somebody else ‘got’ that kind of a look.

Ooo-ooo, isn’t she about as cute as a lil’ monkey?

Published April 4, 2012 by Sandee


How does this work?  I haven’t eaten or slept.  The ugly’s in them, in me.  I shouldn’t be out.  It’s not safe.  The people in my train car they see the bilious ooze coming out of my pores.  I attract noxious energy that makes me hate, back in return.  I’m nauseous.  But God forbid I should have to hurl — this stupid train doesn’t allow you to walk in between cars, like the old big grey ones.  And it’s fucking express. The man sitting across from me digs wax from his ear, rolls it up and flicks it in the floor.  His features are asymmetrical in a non aesthetic way.  This train smells like, like… The woman wearing pink platform shoes and a mini-dress carries her shoulders too high like she’s expecting something.  Her legs — I can see she’s relied on them for a while — they’re long, strong-looking.  But I can still hear her quietly begging.  She’s self-conscious.  I refuse to let her see me, looking.  She’s tossed her hair, that fake-ass hair, too many times.  Shethinks people believe it’s hers.  Trouble-makers.  There are more of them in this train car.  They look at me – I know.  I know they’re judging me.  I am judgmental.  The only one I like is on my left, a self-contained woman in a blue and burgundy print dress and black shoes.  Her heels are moderate.  She’s reading and not looking up and around, all needy.  She’s not looking for approval and doesn’t offend me.  Her gestures don’t spill over into my space.  This is a rolling coffin and damn I could define the stench but it would make me sick.

On the other side of that ear digger guy is a little scrunched in one — people-pleaser. She gave money to that subway car performer.  I didn’t give a goddamned thing!  Oh and now she’s smiling — to herself, one of those creepy, subtle smiles.  Smiling, smiling – what the fuck’s she smiling at!  She’d dig a knife in your back with that thing on her face.  I know the type:  “I have a good heart.  Like me.  Please?  I do good for people.  Oh don’t hurt me.  You’re going to hurt me because you don’t smile at the sunny day.”  Do you know the depth of the world’s dysfunction?  This gesture of giving a dollar to a man who’ll probably use it for crack, will help?  Why the hell can’t she stop smiling?  She looks like a nut!  Crazy. She’s a little thing, like a rhesus monkey with long brown hair, wearing a trench coat.  Ooooo-ooo, you sooo cute, I protect you littoo monkey…