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Mama’s Getting Fat

Published May 14, 2012 by Sandee

I must cut back on cake.  Maybe I’ll start eating Cumberland Sausages like Dotty Head Banger.  The jeans that I buy that flatter an old woman’s shape can only work but so much to do the trick…

A couple of weeks ago I mentioned that I would be visiting my lovely sister and her family in MA tomorrow.  They are not Luddites like me.  They have a nice modern camera.  I want them to take pictures of me so that I can see truthfully how big my ass is.

There’s a strange mechanism in the brain that clicks in when you’re at home.  The mechanism is for survival.  It controls the image in your mirror at home, displaying you in a way that’s not so fat, so that you feel more confident when you go outside.  But in the bathroom at work, you look in the full length mirror and say, “What the hell is this shit?!”

This has been a vain post by Sandee Harris.