But if you put some butter on it

Under the same standard responsible for punishing Paula Deen, if we asked big business owners, politicians and blue-collar workers — Asian, black, white, Latino, Samoan — if they ever used racial slurs and they told the truth, we’d have no one to run the country, no goods or services, no Honey Nut Cheerios, or computers — the highways would be fucked up from disrepair and there would be no elevator inspectors or pilots.

Paula Deen got caught out there, because let me tell you, she ain’t the onliest one.  I think what happened is an over reaction and that she’s a scapegoat.  When a high-profile white person is branded racist black people think of them as part of the institutions that control our lives negatively.  But we shouldn’t let knee-jerk reactions muddy our thinking.

All I read in the New York Times is that she admitted to using the “N” word years ago, but I didn’t read in any reputable journal anything about her saying she wanted black people dressing up as slaves.  Maybe I missed something and if she did say this then she can kiss my ass and she should be dropped from the Food Network.

I saw this video and frankly I appreciated her honesty in recounting her experience as a southern white woman, even though she makes a crack about the guy being as black as the board.  But how many black people make cracks like that about white people? — stand-up comedians — and that stupid Wayan’s brothers movie, White Girls.  What if two white guys made a movie in black face called Black Girls?  Huh?

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/06/21/paula-deen-racism_n_3480720.html

I don’t condone quote unquote racism and don’t want to be called the N word, as I’m sure white people would not like to be called the C word.  And we should all play nice blah blah — and try to do better.  But we’re human and xenophobic and white xenophobia is kinda scary, no, yes.

As Wendy Williams said (I watch Wendy Williams — what?!), what we do and say with the blinds closed and curtains drawn at the kitchen table is our business, but in public another story.  It’s ridiculous to think that we’ll ever stop saying mean things about people.  Maybe we’ll get better but I don’t think this behavior will go away completely.

As a public personality, Paula Deen should be held up to a higher standard, especially if she’s getting endorsements from companies supported by the public, but I don’t think that she needs to be lopped off.  In the case that she offended someone with a racial slur, her business should be fined and she should be given a warning, I think.

It’s my blog and I’ll say what I waaaant!

Ahhh…  Young people.  They’re energetic with wide eyes, velvet skin, and taste dee-licious.  They have the pabulum of hope, feeding them along a journey of dreams.

They are meant to breed then.  Their parts are unused, well-oiled, with the aroma of moss and dew.  They don’t stink.  They don’t have bad breath, seepage, fart issues – oh don’t even ask what seepage is.

Think of a new car – that new car smell with all the parts working, ready to go!  My parents married young.  My mama was seventeen.  I’ll bet my 21 year old daddy was quite the howling wolf chasing after mama.  They were healthy, creamy.

Old women having babies – more power to you.  To be fair there’s technology, but me, I’d have a heart attack running after a two year old.  I’d be dead by the time it was in junior high.

While it’s not wise for teens to breed, I believe it’s probably the time when you’ll get the most energetic and pleasant smelling mother.  I remember mama flipping around, rolling, and singing songs, everyday!  She had so much energy left over that she taught me how to read when I was just three.

We were kids together, mama, daddy, baby brother.  We all played ring around the rosies – ha!  Problem is that when my brother and I became adolescents we all had fist fights – nah just jivin’!

I think women are meant to breed at 16 – yeah I said it!  This is why they don’t smell and have so much energy.  They are rosebuds admired for their vibrant color and emollience.  And boys the same.  They are firm and smell like spearmint and fresh cut grass.  They are strong and can chase girls for 32 miles.  I know this to be true from my own experiences in the last century.  They are fiercely attracted to each other because of these qualities for the purpose of populating the planet.

I say all this to say, what?  I don’t even know.  But I’m not drunk!  My conclusion doesn’t have jack shit to do with breeding.  It’s just that — as an old woman – and this is just for, me, crazy Sandee – while I’m still horny, I don’t know if it’s meant for me to be fucking anymore.  I look fine for fifty — I’ve been hit on by a few youngsters.  But I’m in this weird stage in the past couple of days where I’m thinking sex is unnatural for me now.  Oh I’ve got stamina and I’m in shape.  But there are tingly things happening in my body and I have fibroids.  I think that nature maybe dries us out and makes us wrinkled because it’s saying your cootchie time’s up, unless you’re already married to another old person.

Please pay me no mind tonight — I’m sorry.  And in case you’re wondering – I don’t have bad breath and I don’t stink.  But I do have farting issues.