I got to the dentist’s an hour late because I didn’t want to go in the first place. It’s a clinic that refers all their patients to NYU’s dental school, where they do complex dental surgery on a sliding scale. I have insurance and a regular dentist, but I wanted to try this place to see if it would be cheaper. But because it’s a new experience for me, I had a hard time with the idea of it, especially now when I have a lot of things to figure out – you know, life. This week my vacation began, and having to start it out this way sucks. I’m having mild pain underneath the permanent bridge on my upper right side, and I want to take care of it before it gets worse. My nerves were a wreck on my way there because I didn’t know what to expect at this clinic, and also because I do know that once they determine what needs to be done, there will be discomfort, pain and large payments.
On 96th Street where the dentist is, I got out of the train, and the station was unusually desolate. There was a wild looking man in front of me talking to himself. He was buff, and young. He kept turning around and looking generally in my direction. I don’t carry a knife anymore. But I opened my bag and let him see me do it, so maybe he’d think I had a gun or something. All I had in there was a pen, but I sure as hell would have tried stabbing him in the eye with it. He might’ve taken me down, but I would go down fighting. He kept stepping though.
At the clinic, the receptionist said that the dentist couldn’t see me since I was late. The next appointment isn’t until October. I took that appointment but in the meantime, I made an appointment for tomorrow to see my regular dentist. He might be able to fix the tooth under the bridge and I need a cleaning anyway.
When this shit is behind me I can start my vacation proper. I had a lot of anxiety about going to the NYU dental school because it’s huge what needs to be done in my mouth. I’m afraid I’ll become a toothless pirate wench before it’s all over. I look forward possibly to going museum hopping in Philadelphia as well as visiting some museums here in New York that I haven’t been to. I need to maybe get rid of the idea that having a gun is nice. I fantasized about shooting that guy in the subway station in his head.