They said to buy canned goods for the hurricane. The only canned food I buy is Goya Black Bean soup to put in my quinoa. I bought a bunch of canned foods for 9/11, and for a couple of other hurricane scares. The cans got bloated after while so I threw them out. I usually just eat quinoa everyday because I’m like that. I eat it with steamed vegetables. It makes life less complicated to eat the same thing everyday. I can think clearer.
For this hurricane I didn’t go crazy. I bought two cans of soup, two cans of sardines, a can of sweet corn, a box of matches, a gallon of water, a Jesus candle and the regular groceries I usually buy. I stood in the canned vegetables aisle and zoomed right in on the sweet corn. Arthur from The King of Queens yelled “Sweet corn” once because he was amazed at something.
I forget that I like corn. I had corn on the cob from the food co-op summer before last. It was delicious. We used to eat canned corn when I was a kid. My mother put butter on it. My grandmother made corn pudding. Mmm mmm! I put the corn in my quinoa yesterday. Isn’t corn good roughage? – I don’t know. But corn isn’t in my regular diet. One of those misguided fanatics told me once in addition to the perils of eating ‘swine’ that I shouldn’t eat corn or lima beans because they’re fake food. What?!!! Maize is fake food??!
Speaking of fake food — while in the canned food aisle I looked at the Spam. Hell no – I will not eat Spam. It’s good though. But every once in a while I will buy some really crappy shit like Fluff, or deviled ham – I mean like maybe once every six years – for nostalgia’s sake. When I was a kid, we ate that shit sometimes. But my family grew into consciousness about shitty food in the mid-seventies. The Entenmann’s section had only three cakes left in it today – they cleaned that out before the hurricane.
