Oblivion and *penis

Published January 21, 2013 by Sandee


I saw my friend outside of the bar, taking a break from drinking to smoke cigarettes.  I hadn’t seen him in a while.

‘Hey you.  You drinking these days?’  He says.

‘Nah,’ I told him.

We used to stay in the bar until daylight — what a waste of time.  We even ate our dinner at the bar counter.

My friend’s an ex-cop.  He’s pretty tough.  He looked out for me when we drank together, way back when you could smoke in bars.

‘You were so bad ass,’ I said when I saw him.  When I got drunk he’d bring me home and be a gentleman about it.  At some point we were “romantically” involved.  Some “romantic involvement” I remember, some I don’t.  Shame.  But anyway — I miss that lifestyle when I want to glamorize it, because I’m an asshole.  It was pathetic, going around in circles, obsessed with drinking.

I wasn’t there to experience what should have been good times because I’d be drunk, blacked out.  Sorry to be a drama queen, but I’m lucky I got away from it with my life.

This video from the movie Shamus reminded me of then.  I would be in the Burt Reynolds’ role, minus the penis and mustache – though, sometimes I think it’d be nice to have a penis.

By posting the video, maybe I am glamorizing the lifestyle, because Burt Reynolds is a sexy bastard, but when I actually imagine myself in this position, it’s sad – especially when it happens more than once.  Like, grow the hell up!

After a night of cavorting, Shamus gets up — no shower — just puts his funky ass clothes back on…ah, memories.  Check out the way he looks at the shoe – haha!

* “PENIS” was just a cheap trick to get your attention I’m afraid. 

63 comments on “Oblivion and *penis

  • I don’t think I ever saw this movie, Sandee.The shoe, yes, and then the little peek. I think everyone has a growth pattern in their life that can make them recall (or not as that may be the case) a time they may have taken some chances, or made mistakes. I can.
    P.S. I didn’t need the penis to get me here!

    • Aw thanks BF! I’m glad I don’t need a cheap trick to lure you in. Yes, seeing that guy, then this clip, helps me to see things about my life more clearly and how I can appreciate it more sober.

  • this is awesome. I like that he actually tries to shave. I have never seen this movie– going to now. Burt can rock the boxers. I think one way or another we have all done things that cause us to cringe now. (at least I have)

    • When you’re like this you have every intention of brushing your teeth, shaving, etc, but your body doesn’t cooperate!

      Oh yeah, Burt rocks the boxers all right. I think you’d enjoy the movie. It’s gritty. I think it was shot in Brooklyn as well. I must admit it’s one of those movies where I had to say, now what IS exactly going on — there are some twists and turns in it. Burt is sexy in it and he does slay the ladies. It’s an enjoyable movie. I saw it back in 1973 at the neighborhood theater when it first came out — damn I’m old!

  • I totally remember those days… staggering all over the place trying to “get ready” for work… AH those were the days…. I was typically the chick in that clip… ugh… what did I do last night???? Usually though, I went home with friends…. NOT complete strangers….good times….(NOT)

    • Ahahaha! — Trying to ‘get ready’ for work — so sad! To look at your life now with school and a great gig — though I know it’s a pain in the butt at times — you wouldn’t imagine that you lived like this at one time. Good thing you got away from it as well.

      • You got it Auntie Sandee, you got it. 🙂
        Thankfully, both of us got well away from the “good ole days” and lived to tell of it. 🙂

  • I hear you Sandee! I want a penis too! lol, No, really, I can relate to that whole thing of looking back on some of the “good ol’ days” and glamorizing it, making it seem like such a great time when really, it was a time when I was kidding myself in thinking I had it going on. In reality I was completely pitiful. Great post!

    • That’s a great word to describe the lifestyle Carla — ‘pitiful’. Hehehe — that’s funny — least I’m not the only one who relates to wanting a penis sometimes — hahaha! You make me laugh.

  • Well, I’m glad you got out of that cycle. Sounds a bit vicious and not very productive. Cake is much safer to indulge in. Well, except for the weight gain and diabetes. Okay, okay, cake too in moderation…

  • I have never seen this movie, Sandee. Despite the “other life,” you describe, you always manage to bring a smile to everyone’s face and I must admit the title did make a bit curious. ;).

  • Dammit. I was scrolling down wildly searching for the penis. Looking back on oblivion is probably glamorous at times, when you can remember the fun and not the aftermath and the drawbacks to the carousing. But I’m glad you’re happy and healthy now!

  • Oh, I remember similar days and nights all blending together. I SO don’t miss them. Okay, maybe once in a blue moon but I kind of like not being self-destructive and actually living. It’s harder but it’s worth it, I think. Also the *penis* thing totes worked. Tease. 😉

    • This is so true — it’s harder living like this sometimes, but it is worth it to be actually inhabiting your own body and to be a big girl and confront life head on. Hehehe — penis gets ’em every time!

  • The Burt Reynolds centerfold pic haunted my childhood. Pretty sure it had an influence on my preference of beards and hairy men in general. This movie looks incredible, going to rent if I can find it.

    I like hearing about your past. I so appreciate other people who have also left sordid lives behind them. We all do a bit of glamorizing of the past sometimes, don’t we? I think it’s natural.

  • I was never a Burt Reynolds fan. Not even in Cosmo – he was too straight. But Morris the cat, I loved, and poor Morris they took his teeth out to make him eat that way! However, I believe that outraged people and was the beginning of laws to protect animals who work as actors.

    • He may not be considered one of the Hollywood big guys but I think he’s really funny and handsome. Unfortunately he fell prey to the plastic surgery thing which I hate.

      What in the world!? They took Morris’ teeth out!!! Gotdammit! I had no idea. I’m not surprised though Annie.

  • My favorite part is when he does the one arm weight pull and it ricochets back. Stuff like that makes me laugh. Yeah, these kinds of movies always glamorize alcohol and go for the laughs, like what about, Arthur? Although I guess in the end of that, they wanted you to believe that he straightened out.
    Well, Sandee, you’re way too talented and alive and beautiful to drink. Life is short enough, why waste it living in some kind of stupor? It’s beneath you.
    I’m glad that you’re done with that part of your journey – and yeah, I admit, some of it is damn funny. 🙂 hee hee

    • Yeah, Arthur! I remember that one…

      I like that arm weight thing part too — you could look at that as a metaphor generally for the way things get done when your drinking, taking drugs — half-assed or ineffectively. Thanks for the compliment — I could use it today!

  • For some reason drinking never affected me like that. EVER. Even on my 21st birthday and I couldn’t walk straight. The next morning I woke up bright and early and went for a run. A RUN. Like how is that even real? It’s weird. I like that clip though…I’ll have to watch that one!

    • It goes waaaaay back this movie, but I think you’ll enjoy it. I saw it in ’73 at the local movie house — before multiplex theaters existed — I am old.

      Believe it or not I could also drink, wake up like this and go jogging — I was much younger though. It might kill me at this age.

  • I do not think it is melodramatic to say you’re lucky you’re alive. When I think back to certain situations I put myself in, drunk, I’m amazed, too. Death is not the only trouble a drunk woman gets into and I was lucky in that regard as well.

    One problem is that I did have good times drinking–maybe early on, when I started as a young teen. To be unrealistic–that it was never fun–would also be telling a lie. Glamorizing IS a lie–it’s the part of the self that forgets the WHY of drinking to oblivion. I wanted to be in that stupor, but it was bloody hell. It’s just not fun after a while. Alcohol is a depressant, and eventually, I was depressed all the time, drunk or sober.

    I’ve had to come to the hard middle and know that no matter what, drinking alcohol is not for me and that by my mid-twenties, I’d drunk enough for a lifetime.

    I love the movie clip–I never saw this. I love the look–so unfiltered, that was the golden age of American movie-making, even if this is not a masterpiece. I like that movies took time to establish a narrative, not so rushed. We had more attention back then and were willing to let details unfold.

    Burt Reynolds never did it for me, but I was just a kid. I now can see the appeal, all that man-hair. But he never seemed like the sharpest tool in the shed.

    Great writing, Sandee. Don’t drink. You don’t need it. I know you know that.


    • I’m glad you mentioned that there were indeed some good times, I guess it’s why we keep chasing it. We’re both lucky nothing really bad ever happened to us out there. I think of that often, how I managed to escape any harm being out int he streets of NYC in that state at 3am, often, and sometimes with people I didn’t know — uh boy!

      I do like me some man hair — it’s like fur! Yes, this is rather unfiltered compared to the way they make movies now.

      Thanks for your encouragement and support Katherine — I really do appreciate it. I do enjoy my life more in this state because I’m actually participating in it with less fear. Thanks again…

  • Really enjoyed the writing, and the apt clip selection was LOL!
    Thank you so much.
    PS The title did suck me in – aargh! pun certainly not intended.

  • ‘…minus the penis and mustache – though, sometimes I think it’d be nice to have a penis.’ Girl, your random! Haha. In a nice way. Like, do you ever get bored? I mean with posts this funny (even when there are some serious issues touched in there) surely your head is a fun place to be? Is it? 🙂

    • Aw thanks Kat! I don’t get bored too often, just anxious! My head can be fun — maybe a bit a departure from the norm, but sometimes it’s a little dark — so I dunno if one were to visit if they’d like it so much!

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