Scanning facebook to delete stupid things that irritate me – stupid things people say, stupid posters I don’t like, or hackneyed internet memes. Oh but I do enjoy that Oolong the pancake rabbit! While some of these memes are funny, I rather like hearing original thoughts from those teenie square heads of my facebook ‘friends’.
Know what I like best? Shhhh — deletin’ stuff you’re not apost ta delete – the sobby begging things with pictures – don’t tell nobody ‘acause, I don’t want people in lieder hosen chasing me with torches to run me outta town, like they did Frankenstein’s Monster! Trying to get me to take action on a facebook page by using shocking images makes me feel – manipulated. Maybe you’re eager to show that you’re a generous spirit because you embrace unfortunate souls who have been disfigured. I have a need also to show how kind hearted I am but no one cares. If you really want me to know how generous you are, support your cause on the down low and let me discover how humble you are when I accidentally find out years later that you’ve poured thousands of dollars and many hours into said cause without looking for any fanfare or acknowledgement. Also, please tell me what happens when I click ‘like’ for this that or the other cause.
You know that picture of the mother breast feeding with the caption saying why are we ashamed of this, when we should be ashamed of this — and then it shows three women with big titties in bikinis? I always focus on the women with the big titties. I think Hawt damn! I’m going for these if I get implants! C’mon look at me, I’m fucked up! Why should it matter to you that I’m like this?
But I do like posts where they talk about what they ate for lunch and what time they took a shit, what it smelled like, whether they used Charmin or Scott to wipe their asses and whether or not they should buy the chartreuse or fuschia fishnets for the women’s auxiliary ball.
Hey Sandee bitch, get a life!
1800ukillme 
I’ll second that.
Here here!
Thanks for wading through the facebook mire and reporting, Sandee, so I don’t have to go there! xoxoM
Oh Margarita — it can be hideous at times — if it weren’t for my book I wouldn’t be on it!
Be strong! lol
🙂 I know! It’s a necessary evil for me right now.
LOL you go gurl!
Thanks Carla! 🙂
Whenever I see a “‘Like’ or ‘share’ this to show how much you care about/to put a stop to xyz,” I want to reply with, “or you can get up off your ass and ACTUALLY do something about it.”
I love that Meizac! That’s a good one.
YAY!!!!!!!
🙂
Have I told you lately that I love you?
Thank you Eva! I appreciate the love. In this cyber world we’ve got to band together against inanity 🙂
Hilarious. My most hated things are the 100 likes to save a person ones. Like the doctor is waiting and say well there is only 10 likes… this person is going to die!
Good gawd! I haven’t seen that one yet. Tee hee! That one kinda makes me laugh. I’ve got that one to look forward to deleting now 🙂
If that’s your new hobby, you’ll never get a break. There are always going to be way too many stupid comments on FB…
This made me laugh! It’s so so true…
I just quit. I couldn’t take it anymore. Did you know Obama is STILL born in Kenya and people wish he were white so they could hammer him without being called a racist? Now, I know that’s hilarious, but somehow it didn’t hit me as too funny when I read the serious discussion. So, I excused myself. You do the FB mining. You’ve a better sense of humor. I’m afraid I’m too old to put up with it. 🙂
George, I really would like to quit, but I like to keep up with what my friends and acquaintances are doing business wise, and of course I have my blog and book to let them know about. If not for these things I’d have nothing to do with it. I was loath to go on Facebook in the first place. I swore I’d never do it.
I know. You have a very good reason to be there. I don’t. Actually, by damn, I don’t have much reason to be anywhere I don’t wanna be now. You are the most honest woman I know. Thanks. 🙂
Thanks for the compliment George! I can’t wait till I don’t HAVE to be any where!
I’m so glad I never ventured into never-never Facebook land. Sounds hideous and depressing. Run, run away, Sandee!
It is kind of depressing at times. It teaches me a lot about people. I think we feel we need to be heard. We need attention, an audience. For me like I say, it’s a necessary evil right now.
You are better than me.. I closed my personal page down almost a year ago and miss nothing about it.. you want my freinds so you’ll have more stupid posts to read ? 🙂
Oh boy, how nice and quiet life must be for you! I’m only on it since March and already I can see why people close their accounts! Give me another couple of months and I just might be shutting mine down too.
What? You don’t want to know when we’ve done <>??
Seriously? what kind of friend are you? 😉
there was supposed to be “insert gross bodily function” in those – comment FAIL!
Hehehehehe! I kinda got that the symbols stood for something like ‘insert gross bodily function’ 🙂
Dearest Evil Bitch,
I posted that bloody photo! A mis-reading has occurred. (that was tactful, no?) It said, over the breastfeeding mother with her full breasts, “If you are ashamed of this…”
Over the ladies with the big breasts wearing bikinis looking lascivious, “then why aren’t you ashamed of this?” Photos of breastfeeding mothers on FB were removed. That prompted that horrible photo I sent you. Having said all that, I will just say,
“I also sent you the one of the severely damaged dog…I am just joking with you! You have made points a lot of us can identify with. Cheers!
Oh Annie, do forgive me! As I mentioned on my facebook page, I’m going through a phase and I need an outlet — and a nice pair of titties! Keep posting! You know I wouldn’t delete your posts — but feel free to delete mine! 🙂
Go Sandor! I wonder though, how do you delete stuff you’re not apost ta delete?
Why thank you! I delete stuff I’m not apost ta very gingerly 🙂
I tend to unfriend people on their birthdays, which is terrible. I like to see the “It’s [this person]’s birthday” feature as a reminder to rid my life of unnecessary humans (but at a slow and steady pace).
I was unfriended and it wasn’t my birthday but after being unfriended by this person — it took me a while to find out as I hadn’t noticed — it felt like my birthday! I didn’t really want to accept this person’s friend request in the first place! Yay!! I was new to fb and was afraid there’d be some kind of facebook retribution if I didn’t. Thanks for stopping by.
Haha. I often feel pressured to accept friend requests as well. I usually make a mental note to delete them in a few weeks.
I’m doing a terrible job of coming off as a decent person. I am usually somewhat nice — I just have high standards when it comes to people I interact with on the internet.
I agree with keeping high standards 🙂
You are a ginger lilly are you 🙂 I hope you wont delete me. I get the fakebook flu ever now and then, and delete the whole shite. Plus more.
I would never delete you Anette! I just think people get carried away on that thing. It encourages vanity and codependency. I’m just as silly as everyone else on it at times, scanning back and forth peering at all the dumb stuff on it.