Wanna know my new idiotic pastime?

Published August 10, 2012 by Sandee

Scanning facebook to delete stupid things that irritate me – stupid things people say, stupid posters I don’t like, or hackneyed internet memes.  Oh but I do enjoy that Oolong the pancake rabbit!  While some of these memes are funny, I rather like hearing original thoughts from those teenie square heads of my facebook ‘friends’.

Know what I like best?  Shhhh — deletin’ stuff you’re not apost ta delete – the sobby begging things with pictures – don’t tell nobody ‘acause, I don’t want people in lieder hosen chasing me with torches to run me outta town, like they did Frankenstein’s Monster!  Trying to get me to take action on a facebook page by using shocking images makes me feel – manipulated.  Maybe you’re eager to show that you’re a generous spirit because you embrace unfortunate souls who have been disfigured.  I have a need also to show how kind hearted I am but no one cares.  If you really want me to know how generous you are, support your cause on the down low and let me discover how humble you are when I accidentally find out years later that you’ve poured thousands of dollars and many hours into said cause without looking for any fanfare or acknowledgement.  Also, please tell me what happens when I click ‘like’ for this that or the other cause.

You know that picture of the mother breast feeding with the caption saying why are we ashamed of this, when we should be ashamed of this — and then it shows three women with big titties in bikinis?  I always focus on the women with the big titties.  I think Hawt damn! I’m going for these if I get implants!  C’mon look at me, I’m fucked up!  Why should it matter to you that I’m like this?

But I do like posts where they talk about what they ate for lunch and what time they took a shit, what it smelled like, whether they used Charmin or Scott to wipe their asses and whether or not they should buy the chartreuse or fuschia fishnets for the women’s auxiliary ball.

Hey Sandee bitch, get a life!

40 comments on “Wanna know my new idiotic pastime?

  • Whenever I see a “‘Like’ or ‘share’ this to show how much you care about/to put a stop to xyz,” I want to reply with, “or you can get up off your ass and ACTUALLY do something about it.”

  • I just quit. I couldn’t take it anymore. Did you know Obama is STILL born in Kenya and people wish he were white so they could hammer him without being called a racist? Now, I know that’s hilarious, but somehow it didn’t hit me as too funny when I read the serious discussion. So, I excused myself. You do the FB mining. You’ve a better sense of humor. I’m afraid I’m too old to put up with it. 🙂

  • You are better than me.. I closed my personal page down almost a year ago and miss nothing about it.. you want my freinds so you’ll have more stupid posts to read ? 🙂

  • Dearest Evil Bitch,
    I posted that bloody photo! A mis-reading has occurred. (that was tactful, no?) It said, over the breastfeeding mother with her full breasts, “If you are ashamed of this…”
    Over the ladies with the big breasts wearing bikinis looking lascivious, “then why aren’t you ashamed of this?” Photos of breastfeeding mothers on FB were removed. That prompted that horrible photo I sent you. Having said all that, I will just say,
    “I also sent you the one of the severely damaged dog…I am just joking with you! You have made points a lot of us can identify with. Cheers!

    • Oh Annie, do forgive me! As I mentioned on my facebook page, I’m going through a phase and I need an outlet — and a nice pair of titties! Keep posting! You know I wouldn’t delete your posts — but feel free to delete mine! 🙂

  • I tend to unfriend people on their birthdays, which is terrible. I like to see the “It’s [this person]’s birthday” feature as a reminder to rid my life of unnecessary humans (but at a slow and steady pace).

    • I was unfriended and it wasn’t my birthday but after being unfriended by this person — it took me a while to find out as I hadn’t noticed — it felt like my birthday! I didn’t really want to accept this person’s friend request in the first place! Yay!! I was new to fb and was afraid there’d be some kind of facebook retribution if I didn’t. Thanks for stopping by.

    • I would never delete you Anette! I just think people get carried away on that thing. It encourages vanity and codependency. I’m just as silly as everyone else on it at times, scanning back and forth peering at all the dumb stuff on it.

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