Have You Been to a Region Where Certain Fungal Infections Are Common?

 

No.  Have you?  And I take umbrage with you mocking my sexual misfortune!  But jokes aside, this, as some may know, is a medical related question asked by one of those pharmaceutical monsters pushing their latest drug for the disease of the hour.  The male voice-over says it along with the list of 459 side-effects that you may get after swallowing the cure for your malediction.  Aha hahahahahahahahaha!

Where’s this region?  They don’t tell me where it is!  What if I’ve been to it?  What happens when I go there and I take this drug?  Fuck!  Certain fungal infections? What kinds of fungal infections could they possibly be referring to?  Oh lord my anxiety disorder is kicking in — I’m scared!  I’ve been to several regions this year but I don’t know if any of them are the ones that I need to be concerned with.

I’ll share the words of the great Peter Steele, may he rest in peace:

Large two inch maggots

Decorate my vomit

Infected eyes, ooze with pus!

Acknowledge the stench of human excrement,

Swamps of mucous prevalent…

Every hole in my body drips blood,

Every hole in my body drips blood,

Every hole, in my body, drips, blood…

So…don’t forget… to take your medicine…